Part 180

March 10^th Saturday

9 ish PM

The family sat around drinking and eating, Khanak was missing and so was Pradyun, her husband had entered the house momentarily and his face broke into a smile upon seeing who was visiting, Mahi… she had texted him during the day but he hadn’t paid much attention to it, she got up and ran towards him and hugged…. “Hey you” he said…

“WHERE were you? I told your Dadi he blew me off”

Shaan chuckled, he looked tired and weary but his spirit was up seeing his ex.

She had visited many times before, as “his girl”, so the family knew her well. Chachi even attended her bro’s wedding in Scotland…..

Shaan’s eyes searched for you know who… Dadi caught that “Dekho his wife is not here so he misses her”

Madhavi: He doesn’t miss her, he wants to run and hide before she gets here.

The women laugh loudly, Ujju “Dadi, you guys are too loud”

Shaan yanks her pony tail…

“They met, but she had to go to Duggals on 3^rd floor”

“For what?” he asked blandly…

“U know how much Mrs Duggal adores her, being a Gujju and all herself, she had some post Holi ritual she wanted 5 married girls… singing, dancing and such”

Madhavi: Bhavna needs to shed all this nonsense…

Shaan looked at her as if he agreed…

“Mahi: No Saturday off? And wife didn’t skewer you?

Dadi:Well she went to work herself, Ambika’s son is here na so she spent the evening with him…

Shaan:HL, On the rocks please…

Mahi:He still drinks like…

Shaan: A camel?

Madhavi:It’s a Punjabi thing…

Dadi:Not worth being proud of… his wife doesn’t say anything…

Chachi:Amen! She doesn’t say much…

Mahi:Shaan doesn’t stop, and she doesn’t talk… kahan se mil gaye dono ek dosre ko?

Dadi:He pursued her…

Mahi:I know that story…

Madhavi: I had plans to bring you home!

Chachi: Bhabhi, not fair, what if Khanak hears that..

Dadi is visibly disheartened…

It doesn’t faze Shaan, “Where is Pradyun?”

DadI”Uske saath gaya hai, Ambika didn’t want to, Ujju hasn’t budged from the couch, your Mom hates Bhavna behn’s Gujarati, I couldn’t since I had to organize dinner…

Shaan was slowly simmering rising to a boil…

They chatted and laughed, he showered and returned, shaven, eyes bloodshot, looking extremely sexy in a loose black v neck tee a promo for a liqor company, with a grey shorts…

He drank some more… “My legs hurt” “So bad” he heard a familiar whine…

His wife walked in, in her sangeet outfit…. Hair in a French braid… her dupatta tied across her chest…. Sweaty and flushed…

“She looks like a Punjabi aunty” Mahi said..

“Only looks” Madhavi tried to control her disdain…

Shaan sipped and stared…

“How was it?’

“Fabulous” she said breathless…

Dadi:You haven’t seen her dance. She is a diva…

Mahi:She rocks that orange chudidaar (a lil envious)

Pradyun handed her her dandiya…

She ignored her husband and sat by Dadi… “Mahi is here” “Mahi is here” Dadi’s voice rang in her ears, when she returned from work at 4…

“MAHI?” “WHY?’ “HERE?’ She thought…

She was livid… how DARE he……

“Well shes too tired now for anything Shaan” Chachi winked… “Tu to ja kaam par”

“She is fine” Dadi defended Khanak, lest her grandson really went away and Khanak had to sleep alone again tonite….

“I am hungry” Khanak whined…

Shaan walked over and sat by Mahi…

“Ma she seems like she is going to faint of exhanustion” Chachi argued…

“Oh! Well tomorrow is a Sunday, they can sleep in” Khushboo walked in with her sister…

They all enquired why she was home early, before the end of a week, she complained she was invited for “supper” at the Towers and so didn’t want to fight the traffic so decided to choose her “sasural”

Dadi smacked her…

“Did you dance?” asked Khushboo, looking at Khanak…

“Hmmm”

“You rock that dress BTW” she conceded…

“Khanak blushed nodding a thanks… Pradyun returned after a shower…

“Dadi you invited Shaan’s ex?”

Dadi:Betaaaa! (scolding)

Mahi: Shaan did (winking)

“Oh really?” Khushboo giggled….

Shaan was on the phone… his eyes on his ex… smiling indulgently…

“Tough luck the wife showed up looking like a million bucks eh?” Khushboo asked…

“Even before she came into the picture he would only go to third base with me” said Mahi boldly watching Dadi leave for the kitchen…

Khushboo laughed out loud, Ujju was very curious… Chachi… “Khanak you need to claw Mahi’s eyes out” half serious

She looked at her husband…”Resuming the game from third base tonite? Honey?”

“Don’t you dare look at me like that, after spending the evening dancing with my cousin” was written all over his red hot eyes…

Dadi was absent, nobody heard the call for war...

Part 179

Part 179

Saturday 9:59 am

His admin interrupted him atleast a dozen times, he threatened her with “You need to be at work” and then she didn’t call anymore, There was three baskets of mail on Paula’s desk…looked like Ajmera was going through a crisis…. The doorman was smiling though….

The project was fraught was troubles, labor, legal, design… and everything else…

He pored over designs, spoke to Nachiket… in the very conference room him and his wife encountered each other during the early days of pursuit…. Not a thing in her appearance gave him a clue she was a widow, she didn’t wallow in self pity… she was cheerful and smiling, she spoke little…. Paula was her friend… she saw him approach and usually didn’t make eye contact… they both knew that’s what they both craved… it’s the closest they could get to imitate a touch or a carress

He would play with the same pen she did while talking with Paula, stare at her doodle… very artistic…her “Bye Paula” would echo in his years…

“Shantanu” she would say as soon as he answered the phone, “Aap?” when she answered, like he was the most unlikely person to ever call her….

He suspected the pause soon after was to calm a racing heart, his would be speeding too he could use the extra pause himself…

“Nachiket and him called Rahat at home, talked for over two hours, looked at the webcam from the site, asked the site head to dial in, chewed on awful chicken sandwiches from Coffee Day…

“Its food, don’t get over dramatic”

“They lived before they became a meal for you” she would argue…

He would grunt like he didn’t care..

“Shantanu aap meri baat nahi sun rahe, she would wave his hands as he dived into his NFL game on TV…

He would pretend to fail in catching her tinkling bangled wrists… “Khanak” he would say softly, rhyming with the sound…

“Shantanu” she would repeat… “I sent you 4 emails”

“PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZ Can I just watch this game?”

“No!” she would say with a shrug…

He would beg… she would hold his face and turn it towards him…”I”

“Dear God!” he would graon… as she would slide her slender hand under his crushed tee…

“Some things work!” she would chuckle… he would tackle her knock her breath out… and continue watching “I am begging you Khanak” he would shout…

“I don’t hear a plea” she would argue………….

Their lips would collide………. The game would be forgotten until a collective roar of fans from the TV would make him push her away not so gently… “I want” she would complain… he would check his watch and say “In exactly an hour and 48 mins…” he would say abruptly, tying her arms and feet protectively around her.. as she would curl on his chest……….she would lay in his arms and start to sleep………………..

~~

“It seemed like we were outside the elevator” Khanak sobbed in her balcony…

“Oh! Honey!” Ritu indulged…

“He completely ignored me” “Not once or twice but 4 times” she wiped her tears away…”I saw the disdain in his eyes, the indifference like I am some impoverished fun raiser for a charity”

“Uncle wanted you to sign the papers” Ritu argued…

“I don’t want the money” Khanak shrieked, “Even if it means I am his poor starving wife”

Khanak cried… Ritu shushed….

“Pradyun’s here” Khanak spoke nasally, blowing her nose… “He is sweet” “He is helping me forget Shaan”

“Have you?”

“NO!!!” “He” she stopped…

“Amen!” Ritu muttered softly…

Part 178

March 10^th

Saturday

7:28 AM

It was Rahat on the phone so he had to take it…. She didn’t know that… she didn’t care… she was long asleep… he walked back out, HL ran inside the kitchen to get his toast out… he ate it without paying it any attention…

He  mentioned, Ehsaan, his Dad and his brother… nobody was listening… especially his wife wasn’t….

“Who won the game last nite?” he muted his call and asked a passing Dadi…

He knew it must have been Pradyun, Prad’s poker skills were legendary, even before he started paying the youngest Gujral bahu such unusual attention Shantanu hated Pradyun’s poker skills

He expected a “Aur kaun tera cousin”

“It was your wife” Dadi beamed…

It just bothered him…. Slowly setting his insides on a boil… he wondered HOW she could win, she was usually distracted and distant…that’s why he would talk her into playing strip poker… distraction was a definite perk for him…

“She is pretty good” Dadi continued…

“He must have let her win” Shaan thought… Rahat came back on line, as Shaan drank his 4^th cup of coffee…

“Jaldi aayega aaj?” asked Dadi worried..

“No” he said bluntly…

“Chachi kal chali jaayegi, you guys shud go have some fun”

“She has Pradyun” Shaan sulked

“What is that supposed to mean?” Dadi asked shocked…

“Excuse me!” he hissed at Dadi… started talking to Rahat…

He wanted to know now, how many games they played… how much she won… JUST HOW…

He finished his coffee and stared at the wall behind the dining area…

“Bacon aur laoon?” asked HL

“Nope!” he said…

Getting up… walking towards the front door..

“Is she still asleep?” asked Dadi..

He didn’t respond…..

He planned to be at Ulwe all day after his meeting with Rahat… and a bunch of structural engineers at the corporate office… they were beginning to break ground on block three… 80 high rise duplex apartments… the project was big and messy altogether multiple architectural firms, hundreds of design and structural engineers, 1000s of crew…

“Its too big” “I always twist my ankle” “I am never getting on it” “I feel like a fly on the wall” “The belt wont work” his wife’s complaints about his VW Toureg rang in his ears as he revved up the engine…

“What do you meant I don’t know? I left it here” she would whine, looking for some hair accessory late after midnite somenite… they would make love she would take her nap, he would wake her… she would fight… he would bribe her saying “Lets go for a walk” she would mentally think of what to wear in the morning, and would miss some hair thingie…”that tortoise shell claw that had a sparkly edge”

Riiiight” “I know that one” he would mock back…

She would grab his keys as they went down… search every nook and crany… “Where is January’s Stardust?” “I didn’t even read it yet”

“I had so I asked Pradip to clean the car” he would say dryly

She would smack him “Not funny Shantanu”

“I am serious!” she would yell shrilly

“I am too, lets go upstairs” he would nuzzle pushing her against his car…

“Or in the car”

“You are mad!!!” she would say… moulding herself into him…

His phone rang “Who is the supplier of Block 11 crew?” Nachiket asked very unhappy..

His admin was calling him at the same time… “Not sure boss”

“Hang on” he took her call

“Rahat changed plans, he wants you to go to his house”

“NOW?” he barked…

Nachiket was calling back again…

“Fine… tell him I might not get there for two hours, Nachiket wants some Block 11 data so I am heading to my desk right now”

“Fine” she said still sleepy… “Answer your phone Gujral”

She didn’t care to work on a Sat morning and she made it apparent…

“I hated that purple dress you wore yesterday rip it up” he barked back..

“Its my BF’s fave color” she argued..

“Chuck the guy” he snarled, getting close to a clogged intersection, as hobos walked up rubbing their sweaty palms all over the glass… he fished for change in the compartment between the two seats… found some 10 rupee coins… and his wife’s tortoise shell clip… his thoughts jumped back to Pradyun… and their poker game last nite…he was getting wind of the game his wife was trying to play…he shoved the coins and slid his window back… disgusted..

Part 177

March 10^th

Saturday.

6:42AM

He dressed in navy trousers, and a pale teal striped oxford shirt, full sleeves, folded by his wrist, the mirror was fogged up he grabbed a towel and wiped with his left hand, sending a few of her jars and bottles sliding down… the bath vanity was huge and so were her things, he picked up a couple and read them…

Setting them back emotionless… wiped a streak of foam with another hand towel… clean shaved, goatee firmly in place, he checked the reflection, walked into his closet picked out a belt from over 100 hanging on a belt rack… picked black Armani… his shirt was too…

Combed his wet hair, drew it all back, with a clear side parting… the sideburns were equal…he thought of how it had cheesed her once when a bunch of young civil engineers at Ajmera stood measuring them in the hallway… her self righteous anger… the annoyance gave her up…like was spending time allotted to her originally…

He walked past her closet, things were in place… the scarves and duppattas hung in cascading color coded fashion… dark to light… pale to bright………

He heard the bell ring on the front door, walked out of his wife’s closet, checked his watch before wearing it, 7:01 AM…the bed was empty….

He walked down purposefully, recording tasks for his admin, calling Nachiket… pinged Raoul…. Checked email… did it all …. As he walked towards the dining table, steam spiraled out of some bowl cracks… he uncrowned the bowls, checked wht was inside… bacon, eggs… porridge… poha…he served himself bacon and eggs… HL ran towards him… “Soreee” he said smiling…

“Hari Lal, white toast?”

“Jee” he ran back…

He poured himself thick black coffee… and sipped, scalding his tongue…

Deftly cut up his bacon, and began to eat his eggs, his phone rang every few seconds… loud and insistent… her barked instructions, laughed, joked… spoke about soccer… pleaded with his Dad… drank more coffee staring at the pooja room incense scent wafted.. he inhaled trying to tell if it was lavender.. it was his wife’s favorite nope..… got up and walked towards Dadi’s room… the door was ajar… and there face down, buried into 3 pillows, lay his wife’s sleeping form…

He stood there staring, she wore a cami , he saw multiple straps on her shoulder, hot pink, black and tangerine.. he wondered which one was the bra…. Tangerine he concluded… “her saree was orange yellow”

She stirred as if she knew she was being devoured visually….causing a familiar stimulation in the pit of his stomach…

“Shhhh” said Dadi from behind…

He turned around, sipping… still on the phone listening to VM

“Soney de beta” she scolded, he took a step towards the bed upon hearing that… in defiance…

“Did you try the oat porridge” Dadi asked smiling secretly watching her grandson stare at his wife like that…

“No” he said bluntly

“U can give up bacon for a day u know” Dadi responded busying herself stacking things in her chest of drawers…

“No” he said looking at his wife…

“Why is she sleeping here?” he asked Dadi, eyes not leaving his wife

“Arey, tune kaha tu site jar aha hai” Dadi responded

He clenched his jaw at the white lie his wife seemed to have fed Dadi…

“Who do baje tak poker khel rahi thi Pradyun ke saath”

“With PRADYUN?” he asked hanging up the phone

“Dadiiiiiiiiiii his wife wailed..

Extending her left arm from under a giant pillow, a sparkly bracelet hung from it……. Charm bracelet, with lil shoe, bag, lipstick… he had never seen it before..

He yanked a purse charm…

“What is this” he asked Dadi sulking

“Shhhhhhhhhhh! Let her sleep” Dadi shoved him..

He hung on to her bracelet…pulling gently… aroused… yet angry…

He wanted to wake her… he sipped his coffee and plotted…grabbing a sparkling black and red lady bug…

“What is what?”Dadi approached…

“This” he said…

“Oh isn’t he sweet Pradyun laaya uske liye, it has a bunch of baby girl things” Dadi gushed… patting the sleeping girl’s head… the black hair flowed like liquid coal…he was…. Well…. Furious…………… the wedding rings were gone… but the charm bracelet rested on her arm like it belonged there…

“Pradyun and her were playing poker?” he asked spoiling for a fight…

“Whhhat?” asked Dadi confused, distracted checking voicemail on her phone…

“Pradyun and her?” he asked

“Matlab Ujwala, Ambika” “Sabhi” “Even I won, Rs.780, phir teri woti le gayi sab kuch” Dadi laughed at being a loser…

He felt his heart rate calm a lil…

“She needs to have a baby soon” “You are a stubborn rock” she scolded her grandson in Punjabi…

“I am willing NOW” he bit out in his mind… aroused like hell, his eyes sending her the message…

Dadi oblivious to it continued to mutter… “She has needs too”

“Dadiii” Khank wailed again…

Turned around and peeked… sleep drugged…

And stared at her fully clothed, freshly shaven husband…as he stared brazenly at her now visible lacy satiny front……….she woke startled….

Dadi:Le utha diya…(muttering, leaving them alone walking away stealthily)”Who goes to work on Friday nite?’ “Then you come looking for her like…”

Khanak grabbed her blanket, up over her torso… she pulled…. Laying back ,  down… shutting her eyes… shutting him out……..his phone rang…. She opened her eyes… and checked him out……. Slowly…

“Khanak” he said… (“I have to take this” “I want to talk” )she didn’t know what came next.. she ignored him completely and turned away from him and shut her eyes… slowly drifting off to sleep caressing a baby stroller on her charm…

Part 176

Dadi and Chachi laughed out loud…

Ujju “Bhabhee he is a dork” looking up from her ipad game…

“No he is not” said Khanak in defense.. firmly…

“There!” Pradyun preened proudly!

Shaan looked at his juvenile antics incredulously, as he followed his wife faithfully like a puppy dog…

“She is a sweetheart” Chachi beamed…

“Not everyone thinks so” Dadi winked, looking at Shaan, he gulped almost the remaining 1/4^th down and grunted… furious…

The women started chatting about Mrs Sood… Ujju did face time with Sonali, Sonali didn’t have an ipad but borrowed a room mate’s… Sonali didn’t speak much English, Ujju spoke some Punjabi but no Gujarati… the friendship thrived despite that…

Shaan’s phone rang non stop… “Dad ne kiya phone?” Dadi enquired…

“Ya why?” he asked carelessly..

“He needs to slow down he is burnt out” Dadi declared…

“Anil and him have planned a getaway” Chachi announced…

Dadi looked enquiringly “Scottish valley”

“Madhavi?”

“Just MEN” Chachi giggled.

“These two have NO time, whenever they do, they fight”

Shaan stood up as if Dadi cracked a whip..

“See he doesn’t want to be around when I start talking about his adamant nature”

Dadi complained in Punjabi…

“Your gran daughter in law is the definition of obstinate” Shaan offered mercilessly…in Punjabi…

Dadi didn’t appreciate that criticism…

Shaan went back on the phone “Nachiket ko bulao aap phone par, sham ko do structural engineers hain duty par who kidhar hain?”

“What was the name again?” he barked, waving to HL, with his empty mug… quietly tasting his wife’s leftover samosa… she had abandoned it as it was a lil too spicy today….

HL appeared with another mug of chilled beer…

“Apne in laws ke saamne bhi peeya yeh” Dadi worried…

“They are so religious” Chachi squirmed…

“He has no shame”

Shaan didn’t hear the rest… he just smirked and walked up to his room, he heard Pradyun whiny voice from his wife’s art room, he had noticed her new charcoal sketches, as it lay against a wall when the door was open, since they were at war, he wouldn’t get to see them any time… Pradyun was an unexpected visitor… he was sending a message to his wife fair and square by ignoring her attempts to patch up… but the twerp’s entry was about to ruin his life in more ways than one…

“Four kinds” he heard his wife say, by the door, the structural engineer came on the line, he walked to his laptop in the lounge seating area, the master bedroom has multiple seating areas… the place looked like a dump… his camera, telescope things… his drawings… some civil engg docs… stuff strewn all over…

The wet towels were gone from the bed… he hadn’t shared it since Holi…

He ached for her… after seeing her in that saree his hunger grew…

“Khanak” he said,muting the phone.... his insecurity over Pradyun was making him forget his anger over her actions.... briefly albeit... but yes... he wanted to say her name....… she acted like he didn’t exist…

She looked for something in the huge chest of drawer in the bedroom area… “her” side… he listened to the structural engineer, walked up to her and placed the freezing mug on her bare waist, she shrieked and turned around…her eyes big accusing pools…he wasnt willing to give her the time of day until Pradyun arrived… until he saw her in the saree… now he wanted her..he set his mug on the chest… she gave him a equally cold look, wiped off the droplets from her waist… he caught the hand… and they struggled… she not wanting to talk… him on the phone listening to the Engr…he shoved her slowly against the wall… she had a bunch of some pencils in her hand… she waved it threateningly… without talking, he let go of her hand.. and caressed her waist… she buckled… aroused… “Stop it” she hissed…. The goatee was smooth now, but the face was stubbly… he hadn’t had his evening shave…

“Subah ki reports dekho aap” he barked into the phone, holding his wife prisoner…her breathing was audible, heavy and hot….the front door was open…

“Nachiket hain wahan, unko deejiye phone” he sounded annoyed….she moved her face from side to side to avoid his descending head…

She reached for his phone with her free left hand…but his hand was bigger and his phone secure….”I am going to scream for help” she hissed…

They both didn’t smile… aroused and hungry but not amused… his thumb was on her exposed semi circle of the navel….. her groan was unconcealed…she held his wrist… on her belly stopping him…tried to capture his thumb….”Pull them out of the block C roofing and get them to fix this mess” Shaan argued with his boss…

He swore as Khanak refused to let go of his wrist…. She lay against the wall trembling…his face was close enough that she could feel the prickly beard all over her ear and cheek… but it didn’t bruise her yet….

He smelled like some cologne… the flat black bottle… she thought… and the beer….he was brazen… he would take her right there against the wall if she let him…

“Bhabhee, did you do this?” Ujju squealed… from 30 feet away, from the hallway.. near the art room…

Shaan steadied her… as she slid on the wall… straightening himself…

“I was going to go see Rahat” he argued…

She slithered from under him and took off… flushed and unsatiated..

Part 175

“So what plans for the weekend Kanak?” Prad asked using her name…

“Wait for Monday” her husband supplied… with mirth(Monday Chachi, Ujju were returning and so Prad was too)… walking towards the couch area… seeing his wife and his cousin sitting side by side… as his wife stiffened involuntarily…

Dadi laughed out loud, at that comment noting no malice… “You love your work, that doesn’t mean he loves college too”Dadi joked in Punjabi…but the man that said it was just staring at his wife…. What Dadi said to him did not register one bit…

“You broke up with her becoz her parents’ house was tidy?” Chachi prodded…

Prad grunted…

“Kudi kinni soni si” Dadi lamented…

“Homely too”

Shaan smirked…

“Kyon?” Dadi asked…

Shaan just shook his head…

“Mom it wasn’t… I mean they lived together” Chachi bit her last few words..

“Oh!” said Dadi acknowledging that the relationship was physical…

Dadi was used to such things, being part of Mumbai high society…

“Moreover Hes a Gujral” “They love their liqor and …..“Chachi stopped mid way to punch Pradyun, as he pretended to flinch…

Khanak blushed a intense red…. “Liqor and sex” butterflies took flight in her stomach…. Crashing against the walls….as slow heat enveloped her….

HL:Bhabhi aapka fevreet, samosa.

Khanak reached…. “Oh! Maine haath nahi dhoye, thanks so much HL” she thanked him kindly

Her husband poured a mouthful of beer from the frosted mug…. And stared as she stood up… in a orange green saree… no make up, or jewelry…. Her rings were gone too… the neck line plunged…. In free fall…she dressed like she didn’t care… yet carefully….not an ounce of body fat anywhere… her waist smooth as butter…..he caught a faint glimpse of her navel as it tried to escape the binding of her skirt’s draw string….Pradyun was sitting on the edge of her saree trail, she turned as she felt a tug….”Meri saree” she said possessively…

He got up startled… and he stared too, as her hair cascaded down on both sides of her face…

“Don’t mess with a lady’s saree” Chachi ordered…

Khanak turned around and gave Chachi a glorious smile… “Amen” she said softly… she passed him carefully avoiding any touch…. The lavender from her Forest Essential lotion lingered…

He answered a call… and watched her go to the powder room… his eyes waited patiently outside…. She opened the door after a good 7 or so minutes… as if she were all done in two minutes but just enjoyed the torture….

She didn’t have to look up across the giant living room to know who was watching her… her neck, face was all damp, tendrils hung from around her face….scrubbed clean…..the family’s toiletries were tucked inside a oak chest like shelf… she must have used hers… when she ran out sometimes, she would step out of the shower in the Master to search for another bar… he would urge her to use his… some French designer male soap…. She would smirk… he would take the soap and rub it on he… he did it once…she texted him during the day to accuse him of making her smell like a guy…

“Your guy”he responded back…

A rivulet snaked down her cleavage…. He watched its heavenly trip… with unconcealed hunger…she reached out and smudged it off with her index finger….and met his eyes… nervously letting go of the drop… as it fell down in despair… as she approached her spot by Pradyun on he couch, he scaled the 5 steps to it and sat down by Pradyun…sending her a message “Its between us”

“Leave Pradyun out of it”

“Pradyun maine parson Mall Rd ki ek tasvee banayi, tum dekhoge?” she asked casually, not giving her husband a second look…

The Hindi had the British bloke falling hook line and sinker…..”I have no idea what that means, but the answer is Yes”

Dadi and Chachi laughed out loud…

Ujju “Bhabhee he is a dork” looking up from her ipad game…

“No he is not” said Khanak in defense firmly..